Maybe I'm Bitter

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Is it radical to believe that a man and a woman can be equals?

That they can look into each others eyes without the slightest snarl or fight for dominance.  In a relationship, can't two people take turns being in lead?  I guess not.  Well, that is to say, the people I've been associating with don't seem to think so.  They seem to think that it is a bitter sentiment to not want to "belong" to somebody.  That even in 2011 it is strange to want to have shared power in a romantic/long-term relationship, rather than hierarchy.   It makes me sad in a way.  But not doubtful.

I am hopeful that there is a person I will be able to share my dominance with.  That there is someone on this planet who I will be able to go home to and share the tasks and the responsibilities that come with life and it's facets (taking out the trash, debts, etc).  No chance will I work like a slave for currency or recognition just to go home and be subordinate to somebody else.  Perhaps that might seem extreme, but there are so many reasons why I should feel that way!

The government, for one, is constantly in my ear screaming "work! change! pay taxes! feel fear! be a dummy...obey me!"  Coworkers complain about their low-income plight and their wish for fame.  Employers joke about their companies gathering "paid servants,"  and here I am wallowing in the wind.  Trudging my way through a pit of damnation; all frequencies trying to plot against me (though I am not a conspiracy theorist).  Meanwhile all this goes on and effects every individual.  It would be overwhelming to acknowledge it and withstand the world alone.  Thank heavens for the families that stand with us, including my own.

Yet in any case, one day my mother will die, my brother will be far, and my friends (shall I call them friends) will only see me in the back pages of their picture books or forgotten, outdated photo albums on facebook.  They'll see my face, but will they remember me?

I hope that it is during this distant time that I am with my true friend-I might even call him my partner/boyfriend/other half-cultivating a life of spiteful disobedience.  He'll be someone who has the same motives as me.  That sees the world as his oyster, and learns rules so that he can consider them and break them if necessary.  We'll settle down perhaps in the Alps of Switzerland and practice new rituals of anarchy, which would be those that bring about peacefulness and  mindsets rooted in an earthen quality.  We'll be what popular culture refers to as "hippies".  Nevertheless, we will have consoled each other through our losses and set a foundation for a life that exemplifies both of our strengths and nurtures our weakness.  We will be friends, in the greatest sense.  We, will be equals...